Et Cetera

I'm Dreaming of a....Crafty Christmas! Part 2.

2011-11-27T22:33:00.005-05:00

Other cool gifts we're planning on giving this year are homemade "hand" ornaments. Originally I was planning on making these awesome bird ornaments a la Martha Stewart. However, it struck me that our family would probably rather have something more personal than a pretty bird...perhaps, stencils of their grandchildren's hands?

I can remember making hand ornaments in preschool- well, I can remember my siblings making them at least. They were set in plaster and SUPER heavy- Mama had to put them wayyyy back on the branches to keep them from sliding off. Anyway, I know how much she liked them, so I figured, why not combine the ideas of Martha's great, light dough and the handprint theme?

To make our ornaments, I mixed up Martha's dough, which consists of cinnamon, applesauce, and craft glue. The mix smells heavenly, by the way. After letting it firm up for a bit, I rolled it out. To form the hand shapes, I cut the dough around a tracing I drew for each of my girls on cardstock.

After the dough dried, I painted the ornaments and put the girls' initials on the appropriate hands. I also tied ribbon on and wrote the year on the back in marker.

I think these came out really cute and I hope everyone likes them as much as I do!

I'm Dreaming of a....Crafty Christmas! Part 1.

2011-11-23T06:43:00.006-05:00

(Obviously my efforts to blog daily are an epic fail. An ER visit for what I thought was an appendix issue turned into the 12-hour migraine-from-hell, and the blogging train derailed from there. To make up for it, the next few posts will be amazing ideas for how you can make great, homemade Christmas gifts that don't scream 'homemade' or have relatives struggling for polite ways to express their gratitude.)

Idea #1: Liquor, and/or liquor assortment

Making homemade flavored liquor is not only easy, but results in a product that is often superior to what you'd buy in the store. This year Brett and I decided to make limoncello, Irish cream (aka Bailey's), and coffee liquor (aka Kahlua.) Because limoncello takes the longest (upwards of a month), it's already brewing away. The Irish cream and coffee liquors are pretty instant-gratification, so we won't be mixing them up until later. I'll post the recipes for those next week.

Limoncello How-To, based on original recipe posted by Patty Mitchell

You'll Need:

15 lemons

2x 750 ml bottles of alcohol, or one 1.75 L jug (our preference)

Everclear works the best for this, but a cheap domestic (FLAVORLESS) vodka works too

3 cups sugar

3 cups water

Large jars (canning jars work great)

Bottles for the finished product

Decorating supplies (ribbon, print-at-home sticky labels, stamps, whatever)

1. Wash the lemons to remove any wax present. Peel them, using either a vegetable peeler or a box grater. For our method, we used the box grater. Make SURE not to get any of the pith- the white part. It'll make your end product bitter.

2. If you're using the 750 mL bottles, divide the liquor between a couple large glass jars. If you're using the 1.75 L jug, you'll simply remove .25 mL (measure using a measuring cup) and reserve for another use.

3. Add the lemon peel to the liquor.

4. Hide the jars/jug in a cool, dark place. Shake them up whenever you think about it and let stew for at least 2 weeks.

5. Mix up a simple syrup using the sugar and water. Heat on the stove on low heat, stirring frequently, until sugar is completely dissolved. Let cool.

6. Add the syrup to the liquor. You may need additional containers at this point- just do your best to divide it equally.

7. Let sit for an additional 2 weeks (minimum).

8. Strain through cheesecloth (or a coffee filter) into clean giftware.

9. Allow to sit for at least another week before using. After that, you'll want to store it in the freezer.

10. Share and enjoy!

Endnote: What to do with all those lemons???

Brett and I love to cook together, and we go through a LOT of fresh lemon, as "lemon juice" from a bottle is persona-non-grata around here. After we made the limoncello, we juiced all the lemons and poured the juice into ice cube trays. Once they were frozen, we dumped them into ziploc bags. Now we have *real* lemon juice readily available! We also made some candied lemon peels with the lemons that were left after we wore our hands out juicing the first 10 or so. We will be giving those away with our limoncello. Throw in some homemade biscotti and a good coffee and you have a delicious Italian gift basket!

Are you having a crafty/homemade Christmas this year?

Poor Bug!

2011-11-03T22:20:00.002-04:00

For the first year of Lucy's life, I was *so* diligent about updating the blog with all her milestones. Her first solid food, words, steps...all were duly recorded.

Poor Junie! I haven't done nearly as well with keeping up with her development. We've been good about taking pictures, but...her poor scrapbook is months behind. Luckily I had the foresight to purchase a "baby's first year" photography package when she was first born, so I do have some amazing portraits for her.

Ironically enough, Junie has actually been hitting all her major milestones *much* sooner than Lucy did. At almost 11 months, Junie:

- walks all over the house!

- is very vocal: can say mama, dada, bug-bug

- enjoys playing with her big sister...as much as Lucy will let her

- loves dancing to music

- still takes 3 bottles a day, but can drink just fine out of a sippy cup

- eats lots of solids, including nearly everything we eat at the table

- goes to bed when we do, but sleeps in until after I'm out the door for work

- usually has one nursing session during the night, after work, and before bed

- smiles almost all the time- she has the sunniest disposition!

- hangs out on my back whenever she can

We love our Junie Bug!

My last meal.

2011-11-02T21:27:00.002-04:00

NaBloPoMo prompt for today:

If you knew that whatever you ate next would be your last meal, what would you want it to be?

Oh, man, do I love food! Cooking is one thing that Brett and I really enjoy doing together- along with watching cooking shows. When we watch tv together (which is actually pretty rare), it's almost always Food Network. We especially love Iron Chef and Chopped. Although our tastes are constantly evolving, there are a few specific things I'm crazy about right now. Luckily enough, they fit perfectly into a cohesive meal! Here we go- I'm including the recipes we use as well.

Appetizer:

Hummus with vegetables

(Cup of soaked garbanzo beans, heaping spoon of tahini, swirl of olive oil, squeeze of lemon, as much fresh garlic as you like, sprinkle of sea salt- whiz in the food processor until smooth)

Main entree:

Massaman curry over jasmine rice

(Click on link for recipe- I learned this by heart and now cook from memory)

Side:

Homemade, freshly-grilled naan

(Click on link- cooking it on the grill is key. One batch makes enough for two meals for us, so I freeze half and save it for next time.)

Dessert:

Rice pudding made with more jasmine rice, coconut milk, and coriander

(Use your favorite rice pudding recipe, subbing jasmine rice for regular, coconut milk for cow's milk, and coriander for most of the cinnamon. Here's a good starting recipe.)

Beverage #1:

Mango lassi made with homemade yogurt, whole milk, and a sprinkle of coriander

(In a blender: flesh of 2 mangos, tablespoon of your preferred sweetener, cup of yogurt, 1/2 cup milk....blend until smooth, and then sprinkle on coriander.)

Beverage #2:

Expresso with sweetened condensed milk :-)

...And there you have it! What would you pick for your last meal?

Happy Halloween!

2011-11-01T22:39:00.003-04:00

PS- To help me get back in the groove, I'm participating in NaBloPoMo- blogging every day for a month! Let's see if I can actually make it :-)

Wordless Wednesday.

2011-09-28T23:18:00.003-04:00

Junie @ 9 months.

Lucy and Aunt Kirty.

Whoa, it's been awhile.

2011-08-18T00:07:00.003-04:00

I just realized it's been a crazy long time since I posted! Lots going on here...so I'll try to get a catch-up post put together for tomorrow. In the meantime, here are some pics from our trip to Callaway Gardens over the weekend.

Who Needs a Stroller, Anyway?

2011-07-19T22:12:00.006-04:00

....'cause when it comes to flying,

hands-free,

escalator-friendly,

one-less-item-to-check-planeside

is the way to go.

Leap of faith.

2011-07-03T23:41:00.003-04:00

^^ I'm taking a big one. ^^

As of last week, I submitted my request to separate from the Air Force.

If it's approved, I'll be done in the beginning of April.

At the same time, I'm gearing up to launch into postpartum services full-time.

I bought a domain name and webpage (still under development).

I have a Facebook page.

I'm working on my business materials, which is a bit overwhelming in itself.

But the first few steps are the hardest (and scariest), right?

If you're the praying type, I'd appreciate your prayers as we make some pretty significant changes around here.

If not, I'd appreciate your thoughts and intentions.

On a side note, I don't know if I'm going to know what to do without my uniform...I forgot my hat last week (for the first time ever), and felt completely naked. I can't imagine not putting on the uniform every day. Perhaps my ABUs will be replaced by scrubs in a few years?

I love a new wrap!

2011-06-30T23:11:00.003-04:00

This one is a gorgeous orange Dupioni silk DIY number....

Wordless Wednesday.

2011-06-22T18:56:00.002-04:00

On Fathers' Day.

2011-06-19T19:29:00.005-04:00

It's one of those difficult holidays. Every holiday is hard, to be honest, after you lose a parent. But seeing all the cards, balloons, commercials, etc. aimed at helping you to 'don't forget Dad!' makes it a bit tougher. Brett is an awesome, amazing, wonderful, the-girls-are-so-lucky-to-have-him Dad- but I have to be honest and say that when I hear "father" I still think of my dad.

Love you, Daddy.

Days like today....

2011-06-13T21:15:00.003-04:00

...make me feel like I'm going to beat this thing yet.

I'm finally ready.

2011-06-03T23:20:00.005-04:00

I've written and re-written this post a thousand times in my mind. That's the main reason why I've been so substandard in my posting lately- I've wanted to address the issue at hand, but couldn't find the time/didn't feel up to facing it directly. So instead I've been tiptoeing around my feelings, putting off this post and instead writing about more upbeat activities like yogurt making. I guess that's part of the facade.

I contemplated over and over whether to actually write this down- seeing it on "paper" makes it seem more real. Acknowledging it, I feared, would give it more power.

But here's the thing- I'm not alone. Other women have experienced- other women will experience- what I am going through. The fact that so few of us talk about it- especially to anyone besides our spouses and perhaps best friends- makes us feel even more isolated.

So I'm going to share in the hope that this helps at least one other person- and because I need the kind of catharsis I think writing will provide. Deep breath, here goes:

I have postpartum depression (PPD).

I have been experiencing symptoms for approximately three months. My PPD struck right when my doula training said it would- at about three months postpartum.

That's right- I'm trained in identifying PPD. More broadly, I have training in identifying PPMD, or Postpartum Mood Disorders, which, besides PPD, also includes anxiety, psychosis, and a handful of other postpartum issues. Mind you, my experience is in identification and referral only- treatment is for the experts.

So why was I in denial for several weeks? Simple.

My PPD didn't manifest itself in the manner we often read about and see in the media. It didn't come on suddenly, and I wasn't acting irrationally. My moods weren't directed at my children, and I didn't feel like an inadequate mother. I felt good when I was with my kids. I had an amazing birth experience with Junie, she was breastfeeding well, hell- she was even sleeping through the night! What did I have to be depressed about?

Still, I felt like a cloud was hanging over my head, following me everywhere I went. I might have two, three good days- days where I felt like I had kicked this thing- but then ol' Mr. Raincloud would show up again. I felt anxious. I was distracted at work. I couldn't focus, I felt sleepy all the time, and I wasn't interested in things that I normally loved to do. I felt like I was in a haze. Small setbacks that would have seemed like minor issues before suddenly grew to mountain-size.

I don't know why I'm talking in the past-tense- I still feel this way frequently.

One time-tested approach to dealing with PPD is peer counseling- talking with others who share your experiences. So that's what I've been doing, and it is helping.

I've come close to asking for a low dose of Zoloft (one of the only drugs used for treating PPD that is considered "safe" while breastfeeding), but there are no long-term studies regarding its use by breastfeeding moms. Also, taking the drug would prohibit me from donating my extra breastmilk, which is one of the big motivators I have to keep pumping. Donating gives me a big emotional boost, and I don't want to give that up.

So I'm hobbling along, trying to take life a day at a time. I've come up with strategies to help me through the day, and I schedule in fun activities with the kids, as well as time to myself, to provide me with little things to look forward to. I find that simply getting more sleep (I only average 5-6 hours a night currently) and making exercise a priority are helpful as well.

And I refuse to be ashamed of my PPD. I've been through a lot over the past two years- losing my Dad (while I was 6 months pregnant, no less), a job change, a relocation and new home, back-to-back pregnancies...I certainly have had a lot to process emotionally.

I'm eagerly awaiting the day when I feel like myself again- when I'm not feeling so overwhelmed and emotional and frustrated. Not feeling like yourself is a terrible feeling.

--------------------------------

Additional confession: See the picture above? The one of me smiling and holding my two beautiful girls? That was taken about one hour after I had a complete meltdown because I couldn't fit into the dress I was planning on wearing for Easter. I won't go into details, but it was bad. My point is that many of us hide our feelings very well, and it is often impossible to identify how a person is feeling from their outward appearance.

Yogurt- the Remix. Plus my current obsession.

2011-05-15T12:24:00.005-04:00

As I mentioned in the original post, my first attempt at yogurt came out tasting delicious, but lacking in the texture department. For my second attempt, I integrated some of the changes I mentioned earlier, and the result was amazing! Thicker, richer, possibly even more delicious. Here's what I did:

1. Poured 1/2 gallon milk into heavy pot. Snapped on my candy thermometer.

2. Heated on medium-low, stirring occasionally, until it hit 180 degrees. Meanwhile, heated oven on "warm."

3. Pulled pot off heat, put on the lid (as best I could, given the thermometer), and wrapped a thick towel around.

4. Waited for the milk to cool to 110 degrees. Meanwhile, turned oven off and allowed to cool a bit.

5. Removed some milk using a large measuring cup, stirred in a couple tablespoons of yogurt.

6. Returned mix to pot, whisking thoroughly.

7. Removed thermometer, replaced lid. Made sure oven was below 110 degrees (to protect my culture), turned on oven light to help keep it warm.

8. Placed covered pot in oven. Wrapped thick towel around pot. Allowed to rest overnight.

Here's the finished product, scooped into the Bell freezer jars I mentioned earlier. One of them actually tipped over in the fridge and yet didn't leak. These are perfect for the job.

What to do with all that yogurt? We are currently obsessed with the mango lassi. Here's what to do:

1. Drag out your blender.

2. Pour 1 cup of yogurt, 1/2 cup of milk, fruit and juice from 2 mangoes, and your preferred sweetener in the blender. I've been using a bit of agave nectar, Brett likes good ole' sugar. My new mango secret: after you cut out the pit and scoop out the flesh, squeeze the pit over the blender with your hand. This ensures you get all the juicy mango goodness around the pit and decreases waste.

3. Whip until smooth.

4. Top with ground cardamom and enjoy! These are even better if you let them sit in the fridge for a bit to get really cold.

My Kitchen, the Laboratory: Part 2- Yogurt

2011-05-10T23:04:00.004-04:00

After my successful experience with kefir-making, I decided to experiment with making yogurt. I'd heard that it was possible to make yogurt in a crockpot, so that's what I did. Here are the steps I used, which are a mash-up of the techniques described in both the link above and my Wild Fermentation book:

1. Pour 1/2 gallon milk into crockpot (I used whole, unhomogenized, organic milk and a 4 quart crock). Put on lid and set on low for 2 1/2 hours. You're aiming for the milk to hit 180 degrees (this is both for pasteurization and thickening purposes- although some folks claim heating the milk to this temp is unnecessary).

2. Turn crockpot off, insert thermometer, allow to cool until milk reads 110 degrees.

3. Remove one cup of the milk. Stir in 2 tablespoons live-culture yogurt, and pour back into the crock. Whisk thoroughly.

4. Put the lid back on the crock, wrap in a heavy towel, and allow to rest for at least 4 hours, preferably overnight (8+).

5. Scoop yogurt into cups (I found these great Ball freezer jars on Amazon- they are stackable, pretty leak-proof, BPA free, and dishwasher safe) and refrigerate.

6. Enjoy! From what I've found, these should stay fresh for a week or more, but may become more sour over time. We've been enjoying our yogurt with granola and fruit, as well as in mango lassis. Yum! I can honestly say that store-bought yogurt (even my $2/carton splurge stuff) doesn't hold a candle to what I made, taste-wise. Remember to save a bit to start your next batch with.

I'm still working on tweaking some of the steps, mainly in regards to the crockpot temp. My yogurt came out a bit runny, and that's mainly because I got impatient with waiting for my milk to cool. It seems the crockpot heated the milk much hotter than was necessary. This week I'm going to try heating the crockpot on "warm" while I heat the milk on the stove. Then I'll turn off the crockpot, pour the milk in, mix in the culture, and continue with the rest of the steps.

One extra tip: Save a bit of the yogurt and don't jar it. Line a colander with cheesecloth, put a bowel underneath, and pour the yogurt over. Allow it to drain for a few hours- you'll be left with a yummy, thick, cheese-like spread that's great on toast (among many things.)

My Kitchen, the Laboratory: Part 1- Kefir

2011-04-27T23:24:00.004-04:00

A few weeks ago I had a revelation: most of the foods I spend the most money on are also the healthiest. But last time I checked, there aren't many coupons out there for things like kefir and kombucha- and many of the brands I prefer are small organizations, not the type to offer sales.

Still, I'm not willing to give those things up. I'd rather spend more money on food and know I'm giving my family, and myself, the best food possible. Luckily, I found another option- make them myself.

That's right- it turns out that three of my bigger "indulgences"- kefir, yogurt, and kombucha- are all pretty easily (and cheaply!) made at home. So my next few posts will explain how I've started on this journey of producing more of our food at home.

I started with kefir. For those of you who are unfamiliar, kefir is defined by Wikipedia as, "A fermented milk drink that originated with shepherds of the North Caucasus region, who discovered that fresh milk carried in leather pouches would occasionally ferment into an effervescent beverage." Kefir can be flavored or unflavored, sweetened or unsweetened, and the amount of time it ferments for influences how sour it is. Think of it as a stronger, more sour version of yogurt.

What's cool about kefir is that you can only make it with kefir grains- a mix of bacteria and yeast that combine with lots of other scientific-sounding things to create colonies that look sort of like califlower. So, essentially, you can't just manufacture it- you have to obtain the grains from somewhere first. Some of the grains still used today have been around for hundreds of years, passed hand-to-hand around the world. Cool, right?

My kefir grains.

Anyway, the kefir you buy in the store is a far cry from the real stuff. And it's expensive- about $4 for a 32-oz bottle. Because the demand isn't very high, it's processed to give it a longer shelf life. You know what that means- a lot of the bacteria and other organisms that make kefir so great for you die off. Lucky for me, I have friends who make their own kefir and were willing to share. Please keep in mind that there are many different approaches to making kefir- the following description is simply how we make kefir at our house.

1. Start with whole, organic, unhomogenized, and preferably raw milk. You'll also need a clean quart jar with lid, kefir grains, something to strain the kefir with, and any additions you want to make- we add fruit.

2. Pour milk into the jar. Make sure you don't fill it more than 2/3 of the way full.

3. Add kefir grains. The recommendation from my copy of Wild Fermentation says 1 tablespoon per 3 cups of milk, but I say just eyeball it.

4. Put the lid on the jar, shake it around, put it on your countertop, and wait approx. 24 hours. How long you let it ferment is a matter of taste. The longer it ferments, the more sour it will be. Make sure to shake it a couple times throughout the day.

Jar of kefir- notice the cream on top.

5. At this point, strain out the kefir grains. They can be store in fresh milk in a container in the fridge until you're ready to use them again.

6. Put the lid back on the jar and stow it in the fridge. You can enjoy as is, or like we do (below).

7. When it's good and cold, pour it into a blender. Throw in some fruit (we use frozen mixed berries) and whiz.

Finished product- doesn't it look delicious?

8. Enjoy! We tasted our first "homebrew" tonight, and it knocks the socks off the store-bought stuff. Ahhh...saving money tastes *extra* good.

9. Store leftovers in fridge.

Junie at 4 months.

2011-04-20T22:45:00.005-04:00

I took Junie to her well-baby visit this week, and she's doing great.

13 lbs, 1 oz

24.5 inches long

She rolls from back to tummy, but not tummy to back yet. Junie is a very happy baby, and spends most of her time smiling, laughing, and "talking" (emphasis on *most*). She's still exclusively breastfed, and generally takes 2-3 bottles while I'm at work. We won't start solids for a couple more months. Junie gets tons of attention from her older sister, who enjoys changing her clothes, attempting to brush her "teeth," and removing and re-inserting her pacifer. I'm starting to wear her on my back now, which she really seems to enjoy- and it definitely boosts my productivity as well! Junie also enjoys sitting in her Bumbo seat, and is getting steadier every day.

Nearly-Wordless-Wednesday.

2011-04-13T06:50:00.003-04:00

4-10-2011

First Half-Marathon: Pensacola, FL

2 hrs, 43 minutes

16 weeks postpartum

Wordless Wednesday.

2011-04-06T23:29:00.001-04:00

It's my birthday!

2011-03-28T23:38:00.003-04:00

Nothing says "birthday" like going to work early, right? At least we had a Breastfeeding Support Group meeting today, so that made the day go quickly. After work, I picked up the supplies for the shrug that's going to be my next knitting project, and I went for a quick run.

Brett and I had the nanny come over for a bit so we could go to dinner- first time we've had dinner all by ourselves in almost a year (what's a date night?!?!?). We put Lucy to bed before we left, and Junie was about to nap, so I was able to bypass mommy-guilt for the time being.

We headed to McGuire's- our fave Pensacola restaurant. Brett forgot his wallet, so not only was he unable to drink, but I got to buy my own birthday dinner- wahoo! Anyway, our meals were delicious as usual, and we had a good time, even if we talked mostly about the kids.

I especially enjoyed all birthday wishes, the chocolate-covered strawberries that arrived at work, and my spankin' new Kindle. Thanks, everyone!

I am sick. So here are some pics of Junie....

2011-03-26T05:39:00.002-04:00

....who I am praying doesn't get sick as well (same goes for Lucy, and Brett, of course). So far mama's milk is working its magic in this respect, so thank goodness for that. Since I basically feel like sh*t and have no motivation to write a long post, and because Junie is already rolling over both front to back and back to front (wayyyyyy earlier than her big sis, I might add), I thought I might as well document it. Her first "official roll" was on 12 March.

Can we slow things down just a little, sweetheart?

Emily’s Guide to Successful Pumping: Part 1- Attitude

2011-03-21T23:29:00.005-04:00

In my experience, the most important factor in one’s success or failure as a pumping mama is ATTITUDE. As I’ll describe in coming posts, equipment and environment are two more important aspects. However, I firmly believe that if a mama is truly committed to pumping, she will find ways to overcome a difficult work environment and to make the best of what equipment she has available.

When one first decides to pump, whether out of necessity or by choice, there are several decisions to be made and options to think about and these ideas are all affected by a mama’s personal beliefs and her body’s capability to produce for a pump. Some things to consider:

1. What are my goals for pumping? Do I want to attempt to feed my baby breastmilk exclusively, or am I willing to supplement if needed?

Breastfeeding isn’t an all-or-nothing relationship. Even if your body is not able to produce enough for the pump to breastfeed exclusively, every ounce of breastmilk counts- and, after all, breastfeeding isn’t just about breast milk. I’ve heard many mothers say that they were unable to pump “enough,” so they quit entirely and went to formula or donated breastmilk. Remember that inability to pump DOES NOT equal inability to breastfeed, as some women are physically unable to maintain their supply on a pump. Are you willing to pump even if you have to supplement? Giving formula during the day and nursing when you’re home is an option. Even when my supply plummeted during my pregnancy with Junie, and Lucy was receiving formula bottles while I was at work, I was able to nurse Lucy when I was home. She didn’t get much milk, but I reminded myself that every drop of breastmilk contains antibodies, and the comfort and closeness we shared was wonderful.

Some suggestions: continue to breastfeed when you’re home. If you’re comfortable with the idea, put your baby in bed with you- baby can nurse at night. I’ve slept through more nursing sessions than I can possibly count. Some babies even reverse-cycle, sleeping while mom is away and nursing frequently when mom is home. This makes things easier for a mom who has trouble producing for the pump, because it decreases the amount that baby must be supplemented- especially in an older baby who is also taking solids.

2. How long do I want to pump for?

Setting a goal in regards to how long you want to pump is important, both emotionally and for practical reasons. If you only want to pump for a few weeks or months, renting a hospital grade pump is probably a better option than buying a pump designed for home use. If you are committed to pumping for several months to a year or beyond, buying a pump is the more economically sound decision.

Goals also help keep you focused. Set short-term goals- they are easier to meet, which is very motivating. Once you meet those, you can set your sights higher. I’ve known mamas who initially wanted to pump for 4 months, and dedicated themselves to that amount of time. By the time they reached that point, they had adapted so well and pumping was such a part of their daily routine that they set new goals for themselves- pumping for a year or even beyond.

3. Who can I talk to? What support is available?

I have found that talking to other mamas who are going through the same experiences as myself is incredibly helpful. In-person support groups, online groups, someone who works with you and pumps as well- all are options. In my last workplace, we didn’t have a designated pumping area- so I made my office into one. I pumped at the same time as a co-worker, and it really made things easier. It was a wonderful opportunity to support one another and share “tips of the trade,” which I’ll talk about later.

4. Be gentle with yourself.

Even if pumping doesn’t work out for you- whether it’s because of physical or emotional reasons- treat yourself kindly. You’ve done the best you could, and there’s no shame in that.

Lucy at 18 months.

2011-03-17T21:32:00.003-04:00

Weight: 22.4 lbs (20th percentile)

Length: 32.48 in (70th percentile)

Head: 18 in (25th percentile)

So basically Lucy is growing like a weed, and has *luckily* not inherited my giant head.

The doctor didn't bug me about her speech, either- he was too busy being impressed by her signing. (Insert sigh of relief here.) Luckily Lucy was on her A-game today and signed several phrases for him- including "help-ball-please," as she reached for the ball on his desk.

Wordless Wednesday.

2011-03-09T22:47:00.001-05:00

I'm still here...and Lucy's still not talking.

2011-03-07T22:42:00.003-05:00

As I type, Junie is sleeping on the Boppy on my lap. Her right hand is clutching my chin- one of her cute little habits. I've been trying to get her to take a short nap all night- no luck. Just like her older sister, Junie demands to be held at. all. times. The child could be out cold, but the minute I put her down, she's wide awake.

Anyway, both girls are doing great. Lucy's been nightweaned successfully (for the second time), and is either sleeping through the night or waking once, settling back down quickly for Daddy. Junie sleeps through the night most nights, but if she does wake, a quick nursing session has her asleep again in no time.

However, I'm not looking forward to Lucy's well-baby visit next week- it's her 18-month check-up. She's growing great, eats a wide variety of foods, is incredibly coordinated for a child her age, and knows so many signs that I've stopped counting them. She can also put together short phrases- her favorite as of late being "more banana, please."

The issue? Lucy's still not talking. I mean, she says Mama and Dada regularly. I've also heard her say "hi!" and something that sounds like "dance dance." But that's it.

I'm not worried. I know that every baby develops on his or her own schedule. Some pediatricians even "count" signs as being the same as spoken words, as far as communication development goes. However, I know that pediatricians are also big on milestones, and I'm anticipating that Lucy's will have an opinion and likely some ideas on how to encourage her speaking. I also know that research indicates that signing does not hinder speech development, which is a common misconception about signing. Still, I can't help but wonder if proficient signing makes speech less of a priority for a child.

I can't wait until Lucy becomes more verbal. I just want to hear her little voice!

Baby steps.

2011-02-25T21:14:00.003-05:00

In the coming weeks, I have a few projects planned. First, I'll be starting a new blog. This yet-to-be-named endeavor will *exclusively* house information related to pregnancy/birthing/ breastfeeding/pumping at work/other similar topics. This website will also contain helpful resources related to those subjects and serve as a starting point for info regarding my doula services. Second, I'm working on a series of posts focusing on pumping at work, tentatively broken up into "Environment," "Equipment," and "Attitude." So look for lots of new info in the coming weeks!

On a personal note, I'm feeling like I'm stuck in a bit of a slump. Training for my half-marathon is going well, the girls are doing great, work is okay. I can't help but feel that I'm in some kind of holding pattern, though. It's hard when you know where you want to be in life, but are not in the position to make the changes necessary to get there.

I have about a year left in the military. Then I'm out, and we're headed back to Athens so Brett can finish up his PhD. While he does that, I'll be busy with the girls and my doula-ing. By the time Brett graduates, it'll be time for Lucy to be in (gasp!) kindergarten, and Junie will be right behind. Right now I plan on focusing on the girls until Brett graduates and they're both in school, at which point I want to pursue a Midwifery degree- preferably through Emery's Nurse Midwife program.

Right now, all I can do is try to be patient. To work on my doula certification so that I can get as much experience as possible working with mamas and babies. To enjoy spending time with the girls and Brett- because once he starts working post-PhD, he'll likely be on the road most days of the week.

*sigh*

The days go slowly, but the weeks fly by.

The secret about extended nursing.

2011-02-24T07:00:00.003-05:00

I know plenty of people who’ve nursed their children passed the 1-year mark. Heck, my own mother nursed my youngest sister until just past her 3rd birthday. In the online world, I chat frequently with mamas who’ve nursed beyond that marker. And even though breastfeeding after the first year of life is categorized as “extended” in the US., it’s much more common to nurse for longer periods of time in other countries.

While extended breastfeeding isn’t popular in the US., the benefits of it are numerous. After all, it’s not as though breast milk magically stops being nutritious once a child turns 1 year old. Breast milk has a lot to offer- a few key points from Kellymom (see that page for full citations):

- In the second year (12-23 months), 448 mL of breastmilk provides:

o 29% of energy requirements

o 43% of protein requirements

o 36% of calcium requirements

o 75% of vitamin A requirements

o 76% of folate requirements

o 94% of vitamin B₁₂ requirements

o 60% of vitamin C requirements (Dewey 2001)

- Nursing toddlers between the ages of 16 and 30 months have been found to have fewer illnesses and illnesses of shorter duration than their non-nursing peers (Gulick 1986).

- In fact, some of the immune factors in breastmilk increase in concentration during the second year and also during the weaning process. (Goldman 1983, Goldman & Goldblum 1983, Institute of Medicine 1991).

Besides the benefits listed above, the moms I know are quick to point out that they enjoy the breastfeeding relationships they have with their children. They are proud to continue to share both the physical and emotional components of nursing with their children. In fact, I seldom ever hear anyone talk about extended nursing’s little secret…

It’s challenging!

That’s right, I said it.

I don’t say that to discourage mothers from breastfeeding into the toddler years. On the contrary- I gently encourage it. However, I do think it’s important to understand the differences in breastfeeding an infant versus breastfeeding an older child. I think moms benefit by having some idea of what to expect, because choosing whether or not to continue nursing into the second year and beyond is an intensely personal decision. It’s not for everyone. Here are some of my observations based on my experiences nursing an older child:

1. Toddlers are very easily distracted. It’s not unusual for Lucy to start nursing, nurse for a moment or two, then pop off to do something else. The amount of time she nurses practically always coincides with the amount of time it takes for my milk to let down. Ugh. Nothing like your toddler running off and leaving you with a milk-spraying boob.

2. Toddlers don’t like to sit still, even to nurse. Lucy is constantly moving while she nurses. Sometimes it’s cute- like when she signs “milk” or gently touches Junie’s face when they nurse together. Other times it’s downright annoying- like her new habit of kicking anything within reach. Lucy also enjoys shoving her little hand in my mouth so that I pretend to bite her. She apparently finds this hilarious.

3. You may have to set limits. With young babies, I’m a strong believer in breastfeeding on demand. The babies needs come first, regardless of what I’m doing. With an older child, though, it sometimes becomes necessary to set some guidelines. We’re going through this with Lucy right now. She seems to feel it necessary to nurse every 2-3 hours through the night. This schedule is unmanageable for me, so we’re in the middle of teaching Lucy that, “Mama goes to sleep, Daddy goes to sleep, Junie goes to sleep, Lucy goes to sleep, and ‘nummers’ go to sleep. No more mama’s milk until ‘nummers’ wake up with the ‘new day.’” Because two of Lucy’s new signs are ‘sleep’ and ‘new day,’ it helps to incorporate them into our little lesson. She seems to understand, albeit *very* unhappily.

4. You may have to reevaluate your breastfeeding relationship. See above. When I acknowledged that I could not continue our relationship as it stood (i.e. constant nighttime nursing), I had to evaluate whether I was ready to consider weaning entirely, or whether I simply needed to change one aspect of nursing to make it manageable. The latter ended up being the case. If something isn’t working for you, change it. I don’t feel *extended* breastfeeding is more important than a happy mama. If you aren’t enjoying nursing, it may be time to reevaluate things. This is *especially* important in a tandem-nursing situation.

5. It isn’t just about breast milk. Toddlers nurse for comfort, they nurse for reassurance, they nurse because they can. Could Lucy be healthy without breast milk? Most likely. Would she be happy? In the long run, yes. But right now? No. It’s too important to her. Lucy’s little world has been upset enough already with a new little sister and physical developmental like new teeth. Nursing is a standby for her- something she can rely on when everything else is changing. That’s why she’ll often nurse for only a moment or two- just to reassure herself that she can.

I’m sure there are lots of other differences out there, but these are the few that are on my mind right now.

Have you nursed/are you nursing for an extended period? What differences did you notice between nursing an infant versus nursing a toddler?

Wordless Wednesday.

2011-02-23T19:35:00.003-05:00

PA Trip, Part 1 (aka I begin to experience premature graying).

2011-02-18T17:32:00.004-05:00

We look better than we felt, I promise.

I’ve been hesitant to blog about our recent PA trip because of the fiasco we had getting there and getting back. Have you ever gone on “vacation,” only to return more tired than when you left?

The plan was to fly out of Pensacola on a Saturday morning around 7 am CST. We were supposed to make connections in Atlanta and Detroit before finally arriving in Erie at 3 pm EST. June’s baptism was scheduled for the following morning.

We made the flight out of Pensacola, caught the connection in Atlanta where we met up with June’s godfather, Rhett, and had a smooth trip into Detroit. Lucy and June were so well-behaved that I couldn’t believe it.

After we boarded our flight for Erie, however, the proverbial s*%t hit the fan. Although the weather wasn’t great (picture snow and wind), we were second in line to be de-iced, and were still scheduled to take off on time. We pushed away from the gate, moved behind another plane at the de-icers, and waited.

And waited. And waited. Finally the pilot announced that we were being delayed because visibility was low. Still, he said, we’d make it out. Thank goodness for two things: breastfeeding and carrying-on our *huge* bag of cloth diapers. At least I didn’t have to worry about my kids being hungry or wet!

We waited some more- about another hour more.

Pilot comes back on and announces that our flight has been canceled. No worries- we’ll be back at the gate shortly and can rebook flights.

We wait another hour. Pilot announces that we’re waiting for a gate to become available. It seems that after we pushed back, another plane parked at our gate. The entire time we were waiting to be de-iced, other planes were landing and filling up the other gates. There was nowhere for us to park. Still, he said, we’d be back soon. According to new FAA policy, they have 3 hours from scheduled departure time to either take off or return to the gate. Otherwise, the airline has to pay the FAA a hefty fine- $20,000+ per traveler.

Guess what? Delta’s gonna have to pay up.

We ended up being on the plane for over 4 hours. They never were able to get a gate for us- ended up bringing out a ladder and having us climb down and then hike it across the taxiway. That’s right- I carried my 8 week old down an icy metal ladder and ran across the taxiway with a blanket over her head. Did I mention that it was like 10 degrees, windy, and snowing?

After we made it back inside we joined the hundreds of other people in line waiting to be rebooked. Rhett and I both got on the phone with Delta while we waited. He got through first and managed to snag seats for us on a flight to Buffalo later that night.

Hallelujah, I thought. Even with a 1 ½ hour drive from Buffalo we’d make it to Erie that night.

We rounded up our stuff, made it to our new terminal, got dinner for ourselves and the girls, and settled down with books and other trinkets with which to entertain Lucy. It was our saving grace that the girls were so well-behaved the entire time. A few hours later, we boarded our new flight. Carry-ons stowed, seatbelts fastened, we joked and laughed about how terrible the trip had been so far. We heard the engines spin up and were ready to go.

Just then the *new* pilot comes on the line. Our flight’s been canceled- the Buffalo airport has shut down because of the weather.

That, my friends, is when I lost it.

We once again went back into the terminal. I overheard someone say that it was a 4 ½ hour drive to Erie from Detroit, and that got my head spinning. It was about 8:00 pm in Detroit, and if we rented a car, surely we could make it home in time.

Problem is, the weather in Detroit was too bad to contemplate a nighttime drive with two babies in tow, and, besides, we had checked our carseats, along with all our clothing.

As much as it pains me to say this, I gotta give Delta credit here. They comped us a *very* nice hotel room, gave us free car seats, and put the notice in to have our luggage pulled- a process that, we were told, could take upwards of 6 hours. I watched the girls inside while Brett and Rhett stood outside waiting on the shuttle to the hotel. We finally made it onboard, got to the hotel (where Lucy finally had a breakdown after a VERY long day), and settled in. Well, Rhett and I did. Brett headed off to rent a car and wait for our luggage to show up.

Apparently once the order is put in, you HAVE to be there when your luggage hits the wheel. If you’re not, it gets put back in storage, and it could take ANOTHER 4-6 hours to get it back.

Brett had $50 ready to pay off an airline employee to pull our bags personally, but- miracle of miracles- made it back to the airport just in time to see our bags (and carseats) emerge at the claim area. How he managed 3 large suitcases, a smaller one, and 2 carseats, I’ll never know. He made it back to the hotel at around 11 pm.

We finally fell asleep and caught a few hours of rest. At 5:15 sharp the next morning, I dragged myself out of bed, got ready, prepped and nursed the girls, and packed the car. We were driving away from Detroit by 6:00, made it to Erie at 10:30, and had an hour to recoup and get into our Sunday best.

And yes, June Elizabeth Nolan was baptized as planned.

------------

Oh, and I almost forgot the best part!

Because rental car shops are individually-owned, it’s darn-near-impossible to rent a car one-way. If we wanted to rent a car in Detroit on Sunday and leave it in Erie the next day, we’d be charged $1,500 for a one-way rental. For $225, we could rent in Detroit, drive to Erie, keep the car all week, then turn it back in at Detroit. So that’s what we did- altered our return flight to leave from Detroit instead of Erie. That meant another 4 ½ hour car ride- joy.

June at 10 weeks.

2011-02-17T21:58:00.003-05:00

10 lbs., 1 oz.

22 in.

A Day in the Life...aka why I haven't had time to blog.

2011-02-15T18:41:00.004-05:00

11:00 pm Bedtime.

3-4:00 am Lucy wakes up at least once. Nurse her and put her back to sleep.

This inevitably wakes up Junie. Go back to sleep while nursing her down.

5:15 Alarm goes off. Shower & get ready for work.

6:30 Change both girls, one last nursing session.

6:45 Out the door for work.

7:15 Arrive at work.

8:45 Pumping session #1

11:00 Workout #1- Run 3-4 miles. Quick shower, back to work.

12:00 Pumping session #2. Eat lunch at same time.

3:00 Pumping session #3

4:30 Leave work for home.

5:00 Arrive at home- nurse girls.

5:30 Prepare dinner and eat.

6:30 Lucy’s bathtime followed by pajamas and stories.

7:15 Lucy’s in bed.

7:30 Junie’s eating again. Clean up house- mainly Lucy clutter.

8:00 Workout session #2- P90X

9:30 Shower, recovery drink. Prep for tomorrow- make/pack breakfast and lunch, etc.

10:30 Catch up on email, little bit of free time

11:00 Bedtime

Summary:

- 3 pumping sessions

- 9 hours of out-of-home work

- 2 ½ hours of working out

- At least 2 nursing sessions for Lucy, more likely 4

- Allowance for 6.25 hours of sleep, but with wake-ups it’s really more like 4-5 hours. Getting in bed before 11:30 is a miracle.

No wonder I’m exhausted! You’ll notice there’s almost no time in my day for housework, laundry, or cooking- thank goodness for a rockstar husband who takes of it all for me. I don’t know what I’d do without him.

I think I'm gonna need another freezer.

2011-01-29T15:34:00.001-05:00

...and this is AFTER I made two "milk gifts." I feel so blessed to be able to share the wealth :-)

Workin’ on my fitness.

2011-01-25T19:54:00.003-05:00

I have to admit that I had a very easy (ridiculously easy, even) time losing the baby weight after Lucy was born. I only gained about 15 lbs. during my pregnancy, and I was back in non-maternity clothes after 1 week. I dropped it all within 2 weeks.

This time around, not so easy. Again, I only gained about 15 lbs. Again, I was back in SOME of my normal clothes right away. A few weeks postpartum, though, I realized something- I had stopped losing weight. In fact, I was now GAINING. At my 6-week checkup yesterday I learned that I weigh the same amount now as when I delivered.

WTF???

Here’s the deal. I am starving all.the.time. I eat all.the.time. I eat mostly healthily, but don’t deny myself treats. This is the polar opposite of pregnancy for me- the time when I puke and puke and avoid most food entirely. However, my midwife says that sometimes when you’re nursing two, you hang onto the weight because you’re body is simply going through so many calories. It’s like a defense mechanism. This doesn’t make a lot of sense to me, but whatever. Here’s the bottom line: I wanna look like this again.

Me on my honeymoon- Aruba- June 2007.

I know, I know- that was going on 4 years ago, and it was pre-kids. But I’m going to get back there. A few weeks ago I (in a moment of temporary insanity) signed up for my first half-marathon. It’s in April. I also committed to doing P90X with Brett. So right now I’m running AND doing killer workouts almost every day. I’m not brave enough to post my pre-P90X pics yet, but I will when we get to the end.

I also want to say for the record that I’m not following the P90X diet. It would be impossible to restrict my calories that much AND still run AND nurse 2 kids. Well, I could eat the foods on the diet, but I’d have to eat a ton of them- and I don’t see myself finishing an 8-egg omelet. Anyway, I don’t want to look like Skeletor, and, more importantly, I need to be able to feed my babies- and I like them chunky.

We are headed to PA in a couple of weeks for June’s baptism, and I NEED to be able to fit into at least 2 pairs of my regular jeans, sans muffin top. ‘Cause I’m not gonna buy more, and it’s too cold up there for most of my dresses. That’s my motivation- for the next two weeks, anyway. Luckily we are YMCA members, so we’ll be able to keep up with our workouts at the Y in Erie. I’m really looking forward to utilizing the indoor pool. I know it’s hot in Florida, people- but an indoor pool for use in the winter would be nice. I miss my lap swimming.

So here we go. Updates to come.

Here we go again.

2011-01-21T21:01:00.002-05:00

Today was my first day back at work after maternity leave, and I’ve been focused on two things: 1. I hate being away from my kids. 2. The idea of pumping for 12 months is exhausting. Okay, okay- so June is already 6 weeks old. That leaves roughly 46 weeks of pumping….x at least 5 days a week….x 3 pumping sessions per day…x 15 minutes per session…

I don’t feel like doing the math, but it’s a lot of time to have one’s boobs hooked up to a machine.

It wouldn’t be as annoying if I hadn’t *just* got done pumping for Lucy in October- I pumped for her for 13 months. Even though pregnancy diminished my supply months before, I could still manage to get a couple ounces, and I was determined to keep giving Lucy breastmilk (she was, and still is, breastfeeding when I’m at home).

I don’t regret pumping for Lucy at all…it’s just that another year of pumping sounds like such a drag. It’s months more of carrying my pumps around (I have 4, by the way- a Lactina hospital-grade my insurance pays for and that I keep at work, a Medela Pump-in-Style, a Medela Swing for car use, and an Avent Isis manual), marking and freezing bags, washing pump parts...

If I had the money, I’d pay someone to wash my flanges, bottles, membranes, etc. I HATE IT THAT MUCH.

I should be grateful I have no issues pumping. In fact, I’m glad I had an extra cooler stored at work, because I partially filled 2- 8 oz bottles plus 4- 5 ounce bags. That’s roughly 36 ounces, people. Plenty of milk for June plus some to share- and believe me, I do. I’ve been blessed to be able to give around 300-350 ounces to another mama so far.

I should be grateful that I have a desk job that allows me to pump as needed and coworkers who don’t say anything (well, I have had some “top off my coffee, please” comments- but that just makes me laugh).

The funny thing is, no matter how much I complain about it, I know I’m gonna do it- all for the privilege of coming home at the end of the day, putting up my feet, picking up June and watching Lucy crawl into my lap, and getting back some of the intimacy with them I lose during the day.

On a lighter note, I’m going to check another box in my “weird places I’ve pumped” list. On Monday I’ll be taking my students on a field trip of sorts, and will have to pump somewhere- it might be in a hangar.

Where's the funniest/craziest/strangest place you've pumped?

Wordless Wednesday.

2011-01-19T06:32:00.003-05:00

Lucy can sign (updated AGAIN).

2011-01-14T22:31:00.004-05:00

Lucy's signing has really taken off. Because I use this blog as a journal, I use it to record her developments like her new signs. I'm sorry that this is such a boring post!

At 16 months, Lucy can sign:

Food:

Eat, drink, water, milk, all-done, more, cracker

Animals:

Dog, cat, horse, fish, bird, frog, bug

Family:

Mama, daddy, baby, grandma, grandpa

Various:

Help, bath, diaper, ball, car, book, thank you

In other developments, she also wore her first pigtails today.

Wordless Wednesday.

2011-01-12T09:07:00.002-05:00

Love those first baby smiles!

Let's go to dinner...in Alabama.

2011-01-07T10:09:00.004-05:00

The conversation went something like this:

Brett: Let's go to dinner.

Emily: Okay, where?

Brett: How about Lulu's?

Emily: The restaurant Lucy Buffett owns? (If you don't know, Lucy is Jimmy's sister)

Brett: Yeah

Emily: Isn't it in Alabama?

Brett: Yeah

Emily: Okay. Let's go!

We drove right by the Flora-Bama.

Great seats, right on the harbor.

Junie was excited to be there.

Brett trying on my new shades. A little Boogie Nights, I think.

Junie had her dinner while we waited for ours.

Lucy with Daddy's shades.

While we were eating a barge floated by.

Lucy loved her green beans....

....and was kind enough to share them with Daddy.

She dominated her fried fish. Such a good eater!

We'll be back soon.

Just wondering....

2011-01-04T19:42:00.005-05:00

Do you have a special name that you and your child use (or used) to refer to breastfeeding?

At our house, nursing is called "nummers." As in, "Lucy, would you like nummers?" I probably use this term because it's the same one my mom used, and as I am 10 years older than my youngest sibling, I can vividly remember her using it.

The nickname Brett's grandmother uses is "nip-nong."

On a funny note, my grandmother told me a cute story the other day. When one of her cousins was 2 or 3, she asked her mother (while they were in public) for some "titty dinner."

Makes "nummers" sound pretty innocent, doesn't it?

First time nursing June-bug in the hospital- she was about 2 minutes old here.

Rethinking NFP.

2011-01-02T23:00:00.003-05:00

TMI Warning: This post discusses birth control. If you don't want to hear about it, and especially my own thoughts on it, I suggest you leave now. You've been warned!

Moving on....

I've blogged about NFP (Natural Family Planning) before. I think it's a great technique and, when practiced by the book and under normal circumstances, an accurate one. We used NFP when we were first married, up until the point we decided to try for our first child. When we made that decision, we became pregnant immediately.

After Lucy was born, I discussed birth control options with my husband and midwife, and decided I was comfortable with continuing NFP. I guess I expected that it would work as well post-baby as it did pre-baby. Was I ever surprised when I discovered I was pregnant (with the baby now known as June) at 6 months post-partum!

Whereas before I bragged about how well NFP worked and couldn't imagine using any other method, now I can't help but feel a little let down by it. I guess I shouldn't- breastfeeding kept me cycle-free for six months. I know that even when practiced carefully, ecological breastfeeding is only recommended as reliable birth control for that amount of time. (I don't mean to imply I practiced ecological breastfeeding- as I work out-of-the-home, it's impossible. What I mean is that even under solid "breastfeeding-as-birth-control" conditions, 6 months is the standard).

Please, please don't think I regret my pregnancy with June. Although it was certainly a surprise, I trust in God's timing and my love for my baby girl is indescribable. That being said, I am not ready to join the 3-under-3 club (that is, having 3 children under 3). My mother, as well as several other people in my family, are members of that illustrious group, but I have zero desire to join them.

Problem is, I feel stuck now.

I don't use hormonal birth control because of my religious beliefs. As a Catholic, I believe that life begins at conception. But wait, you might say- the Pill prevents ovulation, and therefore conception, entirely. But that's not an accurate statement, at least not 100% of the time. Yes, the primary method by which the Pill works is by suppressing ovulation. However, it has a secondary method as well in that it works to make the lining of the uterus inhospitable to implementation.

The bottom line is that by using the Pill (and other forms of hormonal birth control), I would be knowingly taking action that could prevent a fertilized egg from implanting. I'm not cool with that.

Further, most hormonal birth control presents the risk of killing one's supply while breastfeeding. Even the progesterone-only pills present a risk, albeit a lower one. Exclusively-breastfeeding my baby is something I take very, very seriously, so this is another reason why I don't consider hormonal birth control a good option.

So where does that leave me? As far as I can tell, I'm back at old-school contraceptives, i.e. barrier methods. Boooooooo.

Suggestions, anyone?

Mooooooo.

2010-12-31T17:02:00.003-05:00

I feel like a cow lately.

For starters, there's always something attached to my boobs. If it's not June, it's Lucy. If it's not Lucy, it's the pump.

Don't get me wrong. I'm so grateful to have a huge supply. Right now I'm pumping an extra 20 ounces a day for my freezer stash, and last week I was able to send 120 ounces to a mama who needed a little help with her newborn until her own supply was better established.

Of course, with all that milkin' comes a lot of eatin' and drinkin'.

I think I eat as much as your average Holstein right now.

I'm never one of those mamas who gets cravings and gains a lot of weight during pregnancy. With both my girls, I gained around 15 lbs. However, once the baby makes her entrance and starts nursing, it's like a switch is thrown.

All I can think about is food. I wake up in the morning thinking about breakfast and how quickly I can make pancakes (specifically chocolate chip pancakes), eggs, bacon, and coffee. I have eaten this same meal practically every day since June was born. Healthy, huh?

I woke up last night positively STARVING. This is seriously the first time in my life I've gotten out of bed to eat.

I'd love to know how many calories I'm burning from nursing alone. What's gonna happen when I start working out this week?

Sigh.

Almost forgot- Lucy signs "milk" when I'm pumping. Fabulous.

How do you do it?

2010-12-30T23:10:00.004-05:00

How do you listen to your tiny baby cry for HOURS?

How do you ignore his or her cry for food, for comfort, for YOU?

If something feels wrong to you- if you have to fight your maternal instinct to pick up your baby- then IT IS wrong.

Mothering doesn't stop when the sun goes down. Babies are not created to live half the day isolated from their primary source of nourishment and nurturing.

YOU are the expert on your baby- not the M.D. (or, worse, the pseudo-doc) who wrote the book.

My heart is so heavy tonight.

Addendum: I know I shouldn't be so judgmental. There are plenty of people who disagree with my parenting practices. But I can't help but feel angry at the "experts" who convince mamas that we don't know how to mother, that our instincts are wrong, that we are better off listening to (most of the time, anyway) a man with book profits on his mind. Just as I believe women know how to birth, and know the best way for them to birth, I believe mamas know how to take care of their children. I wish more women would trust their gut in this respect.

It's Christmas time...at the Nolan's.

2010-12-26T13:34:00.005-05:00

This year was a year of firsts for us- last month we spent Thanksgiving at home, and we did the same for Christmas. Although I love spending time with family, and Christmas is my favorite holiday, I could not fathom traveling 7+ hours in the car with a 15 month old, a 2 week old, and 2 dogs. Not. Happening. So, we stayed here and had our own little family Christmas. Christmas Eve was spent baking cookies, watching Christmas specials, and attending Mass. On Christmas morning, Brett made sure that the tree was on, the candles were lit, Christmas carols were playing, and the camera was ready for Lucy to walk down the hall into the living room.

I was really surprised at how into it she was! Lucy was super excited to play with her new toys and clothes, and ripped apart wrapping paper like an old pro. Wow- was Santa good to the Nolan family!

For Lucy: lots of clothes (she FINALLY fits into the JCrew CrewCuts collection!), a LittleTikes play table and chairs, her own comfy chair, a play "house," bath crayons....lots of other little things.

For June: clothes (some matching Lucy's, of course- but they're are larger sizes so you won't see pics for a while), a blanket, stuffed animals, a name cut-out (from Dixie- Lucy has one, too).

For Brett: plenty of homebrewing supplies (he's into making beer), tools...lots of "guy" stuff. Don't let it fool you, though. He also got a book on artisan bread making- something he's been talking about doing for a while now.

She may not look like him, but she sleeps like him.

For me: a beautiful necklace with charms for Lucy and June, Victoria's Secret gift card (wishful thinking, Brett), a new dress in a retro style, makeup (the expensive kind that I very seldom buy for myself), a food processor, JCrew gift card, LILLY PULITZER ACCESSORIES!

Oh yeah, AND I FIT INTO MY NON-PREGGO JEANS!!!

My favorite Christmas present!

And now, the aftermath....

Junie-bug at 2 weeks.

2010-12-26T11:29:00.002-05:00

On our way to June's ped. appointment

Okay, okay. So June is almost three weeks old now- with all the hustle and bustle of getting ready for Christmas, I didn't get around to posting her 2-week stats from her appointment on Wednesday. Drumroll, please......

7.44 lbs. (up almost 2 lbs. from her discharge weight)

20 in. long

Have to double-check her head circumference

In the 25-30th percentile in every category...she's a peanut, but a proportional peanut!

Relativity, mommy-style.

2010-12-17T09:32:00.004-05:00

Einstein explained his Theory of Relativity using a woman and a hot stove.

For moms, I think it would be better explained this way: When you're reaching the end of your journey in preggo-land, a week lasts forever. Once your newborn arrives, a week is gone in the blink of an eye.

I cannot fathom that June is already one week old (technically, she's now a week-and-a-half). It's hard to believe that she's already here! Every morning I wake up to see her sweet little face next to mine, and I feel such a sense of awe. I love waking up to a mommy sandwich- June on my right, Lucy on my left. That's 'cause even though Lucy takes naps in her crib and starts out there at night, she generally wakes up around 5 or 6 each morning. Brett retrieves her and brings her to bed, I nurse her, and we all go back to sleep until 8 or so. I know the family bed isn't for everyone, but it works beautifully for us.

Some June developments:

- Like I did with Lucy, I disregarded the hospital's advice to clean June's umbilical stump with rubbing alcohol- recent research shows that alcohol actually increases healing time. For the most part I left it alone, only dabbing on some witch hazel when it was hanging by a thread. And, like Lucy, June lost her umbilical stump within a week of her birth.

- June loves to nurse around the clock. Like Lucy, she seems to be a snacker and prefers to sleep with a boob in her mouth as well. However, unlike Lucy, June is a champion sleeper. She already sleeps for 4+ hours at a stretch at night! June has nursing in the side-laying position down pat, which means I only get up once at night- and that's to change her diaper. Score another point for bedsharing!

- Strangely enough, June loves her swing- something Lucy never really took to. However, when we tried it out yesterday, June wasn't a fan of the Moby- whereas Lucy practically lived in it. I'm really hoping this changes quickly!

Lucy developments:

- Lucy's signing has taken off. It's like something clicked all of a sudden! She picked up 3 new signs yesterday alone- "baby," the grown-up version of "help" (I was having trouble differentiating the babied-down version of help from some other signs), and "cracker." She's still not talking- at least not whole, decipherable words. However, her babble sounds more and more like the real thing, and there's a smattering of words there. It's just a matter of figuring out what she means. Lucy also imitates our vocal inflection, particularly when she "reads" her books out loud.

- She's back to nursing several times a day, mostly in the night and morning. Lucy's doing a great job with sharing, though. She loves to sign "baby" and point to June- it's pretty adorable. We've only had one incident of sister-on-sister abuse so far, and it involved an Eric Carle board book. However, I think it was more of a case of Lucy having terrible aim when she chucked it then an intentional targeting of her baby sister. Still, we had a serious chat about throwing things and being patient. It's a good thing newborns are more tough than they look!

Wordless Wednesday.

2010-12-15T23:11:00.004-05:00

Ready to go home!

Mimi and her girls.

BTW- I knit this headband.

She cheeses when the flash goes off.

Daddy and his baby girl.

Love those lips!

MY adventures in tandem nursing.

2010-12-13T17:30:00.004-05:00

December 9, 2010- First time nursing both girls at the same time.

Lucy at 15 months, June at 2 days old.

(Sorry for the crappy editing, but I didn't want to give everyone an eyeful!)

For those who read my blog regularly, you already knowing the following. For those who don't, a little background:

I became pregnant with June when Lucy was six months old and just starting solids. I was very proud of the fact that she was a breastmilk-only baby, and I both knew with my brain and felt with my heart that we were not ready (physically or emotionally) to wean. With the go-ahead from my midwife, Lucy continued to nurse throughout my pregnancy. We managed to avoid formula altogether until she was over 10 months old, at which point both my supply and my freezer stash had dwindled and we needed to supplement. It was incredibly difficult for me and gave me a new understanding for moms who desire to breastfeed but struggle with it.

To make a long story short, we fought through supply issues related to pregnancy, morning sickness so bad I lost almost 15 lbs., the "creepy crawlies" that are impossible for anyone other than a pregnant breastfeeding mom to understand, and overall tenderness that had me struggling to let her latch. By the morning before June's birth, Lucy was still nursing twice a day (morning and night), but my patience was wearing thin. I desperately wanted to at least offer Lucy the chance to continue breastfeeding, but didn't know if she would even want to once my milk came in.

So I was very, very nervous after June was born to see how Lucy would react. On Wednesday morning (about 16 hours after June was born), my mom brought Lucy to the hospital to visit, where Lucy saw me nursing her little sister and immediately wanted to be held. I handed June to my mom, Lucy was put on my bed, and I hesitantly offered Lucy my breast. She latched on, and was so surprised to get milk! She nursed for a few minutes, stopped, and looked up and smiled at me before getting back to business. That smile meant the world to me, and made all those months of uncomfortable nursing worth it.

Since then, I have nursed the girls simultaneously several times- not something I planned to do, but it's so beautiful to me to see them together like that. Lucy is going down for naps (and sometimes bed) without a pre-sleep bottle, and I definitely think it is helping her to feel secure in her role in our family. She's not being replaced- there is room for both my girls at mama's breast.

And in case anyone is wondering, my body is definitely responding as though I was nursing twins (that's what all the books I read and lactation consultants I talked to predicted). Unlike most newborns, June didn't have to wait for my milk to come in- it came in immediately. That really helped in making those early days of breastfeeding a lot easier. Even with nursing both girls I have to pump several times a day- I'm stocking the freezer already, and as a full-time working mom, that makes me feel so much better about going back to work! So if you're currently pregnant and nursing, take heart- it may very well be worth it in the end, and I'm definitely grateful that I stuck with it.

It’s a girl- welcome June Elizabeth!

2010-12-09T09:22:00.003-05:00

I feel blessed beyond words to share our wonderful news. Miss Louisa Mae (aka Lucy or “the Goose”) is a big sister to our brand-new daughter, Miss June Elizabeth (formerly known as “the Deuce,” now frequently referred to as “the baby” or “Junie-bug.”)

And now, before I forget the details, it’s time for her birth story.

As of my last post, I was feeling very down and very pregnant. A great deal of my stress was due to the fact that my dear Mama, who had flown in a little over a week ago, had a return flight scheduled for today. I was worried about who would watch Lucy while Brett and I were at the hospital, whenever I actually went into labor. Because Brett is a stay-at-home dad, and I have a strong dose of working-mama guilt in my system, we rarely either need a babysitter or go out at night. In fact, since we’ve moved here, we haven’t left Lucy with a sitter. Anyway…

On Tuesday (the very next day after I posted my woe-is-me blog), I had a regularly scheduled appointment with my midwife. The appointment went great- blood pressure still very low, measuring a little small but still “normal,” and although I was still only 50% effaced, baby’s head was very low and I was a full 4 cm dilated. We decided that the day had come for an all-out try for non-medicated baby eviction. (Please let me preface this by saying that I am NOT supportive of elective chemical/hormonal inductions, and in a different situation, I would not recommend repeating what I did. Any action that is intended to push baby towards delivery is an induction of sorts. However, I will say that the strategies I used will really only work if baby is ready, and that I was absolutely sure of my conception date, so there were no concerns about potentially delivering a pre-term baby). The strategy I used could be referred to as MCB- membrane stripping, castor oil, bath. My midwife stripped my membranes, I took a big hit of castor oil once I got home, and then followed that with a soak in the tub. The idea is that the membrane stripping causes the release of prostaglandins and subsequent dilation and cramping, the castor oil causes contractions in the intestines (the theory is that when the intestines touching the uterus contract, a “ready” uterus will be encouraged to contract as well), and the bath helps to minimize the nasty side effects of castor oil and relax mom. Trust me when I say that castor oil is NOT fun. For me, it’s simply terribly difficult to get down, and causes what I’d categorize as moderate nausea and intestinal discomfort, but I’ve heard of plenty of people who have severe vomiting and diarrhea. It’s not for the weak-hearted or weak-stomached, and you certainly don’t want to go into labor dehydrated.

I chose to have my castor oil in mixed into a three-egg omelet. Brett mixed in lots of veggies to help cover the taste and mouth-feel of the castor oil, and we figured this was a good way to get in plenty of protein and quality calories, in the case that it worked. I managed to get the whole thing down, and then hopped in the tub. Within a few hours- by about 2 or 3 pm, I was having mild contractions.

By this point, I knew that this might be it, and was ready to encourage my contractions on. Brett and I walked over to a nearby park and played with Lucy- or should I say, Brett played with Lucy, and I walked circles around them, because walking always helps me manage my rushes. On the way home, I started feeling a lot of pressure, and a more definite feeling of “this is it.” I took another bath, got out my birthing ball, candle, and labor beads, and started to work more purposefully through the rushes.

By about 6/6:30, things were getting a lot more serious. Brett and I took another walk, and I was not able to talk through my rushes anymore. I focused on breathing through “loose lips”- making horse-like sounds (Ina May says loose lips above = loose lips below). When we returned home, I told Brett to go fill up the gas tank (I had forgotten to take care of it earlier) and get my bags ready. I still intended to stay at home for as long as possible, but I wanted to be ready. By the time Brett got back, I was really working hard, and at around 7:30, I felt a gush of fluid. I was admittedly very nervous when I realized that it was not my water breaking, but blood. I’m obviously familiar with bloody show, but this was a considerable amount of blood- and I hadn’t had much at all with Lucy. At that point I decided we needed to head out for the hospital- I wasn’t comfortable with the bleeding and wanted to make sure the baby was okay.

The ride to the hospital was a blur. It took about 45 minutes, and the whole time I was in the back seat of the CR-V, facing the rear, crammed on my knees between two car seats and hanging over the back. I am simply unable to work through rushes sitting down, especially in the front seat. Please don’t ask how I managed to climb into the back seat in the first place- I couldn’t tell you. Anyway, Brett turned on some soothing music, and I continued to low-moan and hip-rock my way to the hospital. When we finally reached the hospital parking lot, I jumped out before Brett could park- I absolutely could not have another contraction in the car. I headed into the hospital while he grabbed our bags, but was stopped by another rush. He caught up with me, and we made our way to labor and delivery. Rushes were probably 2 minutes apart by this point, and I needed to squat and rock with each one. However, I was still very calm in-between, and had a few quick conversations with some of the staff members we met in the halls.

We finally reached L&D at roughly 8:15 pm. When we arrived at the desk, I was in-between rushes, and the nurses asked, “What are you here for?” Brett just looked at them, dumbfounded, and said, “WE’RE HERE TO HAVE A BABY!” They looked in some sort of scheduling book and said, “Oh, well you’re not scheduled.” I guess they thought I was there for an induction! Luckily, another rush hit right then, I got into it, and they started to take me seriously.

I was put into triage, and the nurse quickly realized I was easily 7, quickly approaching 8 cm dilation. Everything went kind of crazy then, because my midwife hadn’t arrived yet, the attending OB’s didn’t want anything to do with me or my birth plan, and I was not in the mood to lay in a bed and be monitored- I was going through transition at this point (I found out later that neither OB was at all comfortable with a natural birth). I remember having 2-3 rushes in bed while they monitored and got the heplock in, then said to the nurse, “I’m sorry, I HAVE to get up!” With that contraction, I started feeling very pushy and told the nurse so. I laid back down, and proceeded to pant- I wasn’t sure how dilated I was, and didn’t want to push too early (I had a 2^nd-degree tear with Lucy and REALLY wanted to avoid a tear this time).

Since it appeared that I was being ignored while the nursing staff and attending OB’s decided what to do, I knew I needed to grab their attention. I did so by yelling, “I NEED TO PUSH!” Luckily Miss Only-Nice-Nurse-In-the-Room looked down and realized baby was crowning. Her exact words to the docs were, “I don’t care WHO it is, but someone needs to put on some gloves!” One doc snapped into action, and my bed was quickly broken down. He tried to coax me into the stirrups, but I evaded him and grabbed my ankles instead. He broke my water (baby would have been born in-the-caul otherwise, which would have been pretty cool, but he was afraid, in his words, of being “splashed”) and baby June was born immediately. I believe it took 3 solid pushes total. What was cool was that I was managed to really control my pushing this time. The staff was pretty freaked out that Brett and I chatted and kissed between pushes, and I was trying to laugh and joke with them. June was born at 8:35 pm- about 20 minutes from the time I had arrived. She was 6 lbs, .6 ounces, 18 ½ inches long, and I was tear-free.

I will give the docs/nurses credit that they followed my birth plan to the best of their ability. Brett got to tell me she was a girl, and she was placed on my chest immediately. The staff did her Apgar (9-nearly perfect!) while I was holding her, and they didn’t touch her again until she had nursed well (she latched immediately). They respected my wishes regarding vaccinations and eye drops, let me keep her placenta, and delayed all routine checks. I did end up getting some pit after June was born as a precaution, but I didn’t mind. I felt really great and was up and moving immediately. After a while we were moved from Triage into postpartum, and we ended up staying the minimum (for June) of 24 hours before heading home.

June’s birth was definitely an adventure, and was truly beautiful in its own way. I’m grateful that we avoided the hospital for as long as we did, and that I was able to bring her into the world on my own terms. I’m also happy that we were able to show a group of non-believers what natural birth can be.

Still hanging in there.

2010-12-06T21:26:00.002-05:00

It's no accident it's been over a week since I've blogged.

I've reached the point in one's pregnancy when you can no longer call anyone without them asking, "Are you in labor?" People have ceased saying "Hello!" when calling me and skip straight to, "Are you on your way to the hospital?" Those who I haven't seen in a few weeks, upon seeing me now, comment, "I can't believe you're still pregnant!" My mom, who is currently visiting, is constantly answering text messages and phone calls from family members. I can't hear what they're saying, but I can hear her repeating, "No, nothing yet."

GRRRRRR. These are the reasons why I've been holed away, avoiding the world. I am intentionally not answering my phone, because, frankly, I'm sick of it. I haven't completely avoided facebook, only because I need to make sure that no one else is busy having a baby before me!

Anyway, I'm sitting at 39 weeks, 2 days right now- I haven't even technically hit my "due date" yet, and I'm officially losing my mind. I guess that's what happens when your first baby comes early- you sort of expect to be holding a baby by now.

Yes, I know that each pregnancy is different and each baby is different. But it doesn't help that I've had SO much prodromal labor this time, and by now, hours upon hours of Braxton-Hicks contractions. Over the weekend, I had 5+ hours of what *truly* felt like the Real Thing. Just when I let myself think I was a short while away from meeting my little one, the contractions stopped dead in their tracks.

Anyway, I have an appointment with my midwife tomorrow, and I'm really hoping for some changes, no matter how subtle. Last week I was 50% effaced and 3 cm. And yes, I know that the numbers don't mean anything. It's just that I really need a little encouragement at this point!

I'm still pregnant.

2010-11-30T22:13:00.001-05:00

That is all.

Maternity photos.

2010-11-22T12:06:00.003-05:00

When I was pregnant with Lucy, we chose to have newborn photos done, but to forego having maternity shots taken. This time around, I definitely wanted to get some pictures of the bump!

I had a wonderful time at my maternity shoot with Ashley from Ashley Victoria photography. She really listened to my ideas and worked hard to make them happen- even if it meant getting in the ocean in November! Ashley has a preview of the pictures up on her blog here- we can't wait to see the rest. It will definitely be difficult to narrow down our list of photos to purchase.

We've been busy...

2010-11-19T23:15:00.005-05:00

...hence going over a week between posts. There's no other way to put it- things have been crazy around here. Goose is more of a handful than ever, and working, keeping track of her, getting ready for the Deuce, and doing the million and one other things that keep our home together are starting to become overwhelming. Thank goodness for an amazing husband who doesn't mind washing diapers, can cook, and does an all-around awesome job keeping the house in order!

Some of what we've been up to:

- Re-configuring the nursery for TWO babies. And no, we're not planning on putting the Deuce in the crib at night- I just like having a safe place to put him/her down. And to store things out of Goose's reach :-)

- Getting up to date on Lucy's scrapbook and baby book.

- Knitting! I am so hooked right now. These are my first stabs at longies and a hat for the Deuce. Tonight I also cast-on for my first attempt at a baby sweater, and I bought some beautiful chocolate-brown wool today for babylegs-esq legwarmers for the Deuce as well.

- Setting up a mini changing area for nighttime changes....I obviously don't want to have to go into the nursery at night to change the Deuce and risk waking the Goose up. Also have a nursing area, although I am pretty much a pro at sleeping and nursing a baby at the same time. This will likely only be used until the Deuce catches on to nursing in the side-laying position.

- Washing all of our gender-neutral baby clothes and putting them away, as well as re-arranging lots of other things in the house to make room for all the little-baby stuff.

- Getting my maternity photos taken. I had a blast with Ashley and can't wait to show off the end result!

- Working towards tandem nursing (or at least the opportunity to try it) one session at a time.

- Keeping Lucy from putting bags over her head.

Wordless Wednesday.

2010-11-10T21:28:00.002-05:00

35 weeks.

Discipline.

2010-11-08T18:42:00.000-05:00

Disclaimer: This post represents my feelings only. It is not meant to serve as judgment of those who choose to use corporal punishment in a loving, restrained, and consistent manner. We all must decide how to discipline our children, and I have learned that judging others for their decisions is unproductive, unnecessary, and not at all loving. That being said, open discussion is encouraged in the comments section- I’d love to hear from both Gentle Discipline/Attachment Parenting mamas and those who practice corporal punishment (I’m sorry I’m not familiar with all the terms here).

I was raised by parents who did not (regularly, anyway) spank. I can count on one hand the number of times I was physically struck by my parents, and it was always by their hand on my bottom.

Brett, on the other hand, was (according to him, anyway) spanked much more regularly. Apparently the belt was an option, too.

So when Lucy became old enough that we needed to discuss discipline in more detail, we found ourselves somewhat divided. I am squarely in the “hands-and-other-objects-off” zone. Brett is in the “time-outs-don’t-work” and “I was spanked and I turned out great” arenas. After much discussion, Brett has finally agreed that our home will be spanking-free until Lucy is at least 3, or when we judge that she is capable of fully understanding what she is being punished for and why. Admittedly, I see this concession as a window of time in which to convert Brett to my way of thinking. However, there are times when I question my own convictions.

Like when Lucy throws food from her high chair. It drives me absolutely crazy! For months she was a dream- we could take her anywhere without making a huge mess. Then, out of the blue, she started throwing food. It began with her feeding the dogs, and now, even if they are kenneled or not around, she does it anyway- it’s become her way of telling me she’s done eating. What’s especially frustrating is that she KNOWS that sign for “all-done” and will do it. I truly don’t understand why she’d rather throw food than just tell me she’s done.

I did read a piece by Dr. Sears that addressed this type of behavior. According to him, children of this age love our reactions, and will continue to do a specific action to see ours. In other words, it’s not a case of “mommy told me not to, but I’m going to do it anyway;” he argues that children are not mentally capable of this. Rather, Lucy is thinking, “when I throw food, Mama makes a funny face and talks in a funny voice.” She actually enjoys seeing my frustration, because she is emotionally incapable of empathy at this point- she doesn’t understand that I am angry or sad. So, for the time being, I’m working on not giving her the reaction she’s looking for. I will walk away from the table and do the dishes. I’ll tell her in a quiet, regular tone to stop- making sure to keep my face composed and neutral. If it continues, I’ll ask her (and sign) if she’s “all-done,” and then remove her from the high chair.

But it’s so hard! I occasionally worry that I’m spoiling Lucy. I wonder if a smack of the hand would help her better understand what I’m trying to convey. I fear raising a child that doesn’t understand or respect boundaries, or that I cannot take out in public because she cannot behave properly. I fear being judged by other parents for not disciplining enough.

Then again, I worry about the implications of teaching my daughter that there is room for physical pain in a loving relationship. I’ve read studies indicating that little girls who are punished physically are more likely to experience abusive relationships. I also am concerned with teaching immediate obedience, mainly because I want my children to know that there are times when they should NOT obey an adult- namely when an adult asks to touch them inappropriately, or be touched inappropriately, or, in the case of a stranger, to get into a car with them. Finally, I worry that spanking sends the message that hitting, even when done with a greater goal in mind, is appropriate.

In just a few words, I want my children to behave out of a genuine desire to do the right thing, not out of fear of being reprimanded. And, believe me, I know that sounds like a lofty goal. To be honest, I’m still not exactly sure how we’ll get there. I know that I want my children to be compassionate and honest and trustworthy and to live lives that are solidly grounded in Christian moral values.

For the time being, I’ll keep reading, and talking to other moms and dads making the same sorts of decisions.

I’ll continue to speak respectfully to my daughter, to illustrate how I expect to be spoken to.

I’ll view this phase as an opportunity to work on my own character, particularly my patience.

And I’ll work on demonstrating the same grace towards my daughter that our Heavenly Father does to His.

My daughter, the crab.

2010-11-04T22:25:00.005-04:00

Lucy has recently learned how to pinch. Hard. It’s just one of a string of recent developments that has her acting like less of a “baby” and more of a “little person.” One moment I was playing with her on the couch, the next she made a grab for my knitting needles. When I hastily pried them from her fingers, she looked up at me, yelled, and, that’s right, started pinching my thigh.

Where do kids learn this stuff? Admittedly, Lucy gets much less peer interaction than most kids her age. To my knowledge, she’s never been pinched by anyone else. And with the exception of her Baby Signs and Classical Baby dvds, she doesn’t watch tv- and I KNOW there’s no pinching on there. I am at such a loss! Clearly she’s not aware that it hurts, and she finds my reaction hilarious- it’s only slightly different from the one I have when she isn’t careful with her teeth when nursing or chucks food on the floor from her high chair. It seems as though Lucy is constantly researching how her behavior affects ours. If I had to name this stage, I would call it, “Let’s see what I can do to make Mama and Daddy make funny faces and funny sounds.”

Some of Lucy’s other recent developments/favorite activities:

- She LOVES to give hugs- to her stuffed animals, us, the dogs….

- Although she’s still not speaking many words, she has so many associations! I can ask her, “Lucy, can you please go in your room and get Tugs (her stuffed puppy) and bring it to Daddy?” And she’ll do it! I can ask her to hand me things I drop (handy when you’re super-preggo) and she will.

- In that vein, Lucy is obsessed with opening and closing drawers and doors, as well as moving items from one area to another. What’s worked for us: if I catch her opening a drawer, I’ll ask her to close it, please. Usually she does- then I make a big deal of it, saying, “THANK YOU, Lucy! Thank you for closing the drawer!” She gets very excited that she is doing what Mama wants and it generally distracts her from what she was doing- which is usually preparing to dump everything on the floor and move it somewhere else. I’ve found socks in the kitchen drawers, and once discovered she’s dumped the wet wipes from the wipe warmer in her room, only to replace them with dry ones from another basket.

- She loves to open the clothes hamper in her room and shove *clean* clothing and diapers into it.

- The girl is crazy about animals! In the last week, she’s managed to grab a lizard (a green anole), and has had two near-snake experiences. And no, she wasn’t scared. Lucy pets and gives her puppies hugs constantly, and is constantly trying to catch the neighbors’ dogs and cats.

- Lucy is still taking two/three bottles a day- one in the morning (she wakes up around 5 am, then I nurse her, she has a bottle, and goes back to sleep), one at naptime, and one at night. As soon as the Deuce is born and my supply comes back, I’m planning on exclusively nursing her morning and night, which will easily cut out those bottles, and she’ll be on a cup for her naptime milk. The rest of the day she uses a sippy. She still takes her pacifier, but only at night, and I’m not in a big rush to drop it. I know that she still has a need to suck, especially with still being breastfed.

- Can you say hissy fit? Lucy is the queen of throwing a tantrum. Last weekend in Best Buy, Lucy wanted to climb the lower merchandise shelves. As soon as I told her “No” and pulled her away, she threw herself on the floor, yelling and kicking her arms and legs. The kid is quite the actress! I’ve also seen her throw fits over having items taken away and for not being allowed outside. What does Mama do in moments like this? Ignore, ignore, ignore. I’ll walk a step or two away, and pretend to be very interested in something else. If we’re at home, I’ll walk out of the room. That usually does the trick.

Overall, I’m amazed at what a little person my daughter is becoming! She is starting to really show her personality and her own preferences and dislikes, which can definitely lead to parenting challenges. However, I’m loving how interactive she is, and how independently she’ll play now. Brett and I both agree that many kids these days have too much schedule and form in their lives in terms of early education- classes, routines, pressure to develop a certain way, etc. Our focus is on independent, creative play. I’m also starting to look into what type of home-schooling we’ll be pursuing (Waldorf? Classical?), but that’s another post for another day.

Wordless Wednesday.

2010-11-03T07:39:00.002-04:00

Trunk or treat!

2010-10-28T23:46:00.005-04:00

Trick or treating is this weekend here, and we still plan on taking Lucy around the neighborhood, but we decided it would be fun to take her to "trunk or treat" at Brett's church as well.

By the time we had finished circling the parking lot, Lucy had it pretty much figured out. She'd pick out a piece of candy, either dump it in her bucket or stick it in her mouth (still in the wrapper!), and then play with that piece until we came to the next stop.

She is walking so well now!

Lucy tried to sit down a few times and eat her stash before we made it around.

What happened when I took away the Snickers she was trying to suck through the wrapper.....

We finally gave her some M&Ms-her first candy (that I know about, anyway!)

I was sort of disappointed that she didn't get to wear her black tights and red onesie- but it was just too hot (think 80 degrees!) It's supposed to cool down this weekend, though, so hopefully I will be able to snag a picture of the entire ensemble- including antennae.

33 weeks.

2010-10-25T21:21:00.003-04:00

Since Saturday, I’ve been 33 weeks preggo, which means that if I deliver the Deuce at the same time as Lucy, I have just under 5 weeks to go. I’m not gonna lie- 5 weeks sounds a lot more appealing at this point than 7 or, heaven help me, 9.

The good:

- I’m up roughly 10 pounds from my non-pregnancy weight. I’m guessing that I’ll end up gaining about 15 or so total- that would put me about the same as with Lucy. I’m fine with this, because it means that after I deliver this little one, I will be on the fast track to “back-to-normal.” Being practically continuously pregnant for the past 2 years has not been good to my self-image.

- I have (KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK ON WOOD) no stretch marks yet. I’m going to credit my daily application of shea and coco butter for this. That and drinking tons of water. And great genes (thanks, Mama!)

- My hair looks fabulous. My skin is pretty clear.

- I’m sleeping pretty well. Lucy is napping in HER crib in HER room now, and at least starts out the night there. She still ends up in our room between 4:30-5:30 most nights, but that’s fine because I get up around 5:45 every morning, and she nurses before work.

- This baby is a mover! I seldom worry about whether he/she is doing okay because there’s so much movement.

- I’m still in nesting mode and getting a lot accomplished. Realistically, the baby could come at any time and we’d be ready. Diapers and covers are washed, I have some ‘sposies, we already have wipes in the warmer for Lucy…clothes are all sorted and washed. Diapers, boobs, some sleepers…that’s all you really need (oh, and a carseat if you want to come home!)

The bad:

- I have SO MANY Braxton-Hicks (BH) contractions. I have a couple every hour during the day, and then when I get home at night…WHAM! I actually ended up in Labor and Delivery last week to be monitored because I was having near-continuous, super-uncomfortable, borderline-painful BH. Luckily the baby is handling the BH fine, and there is no cervical change so far. Stay put, baby- at least for 5 more weeks!

- Just about everything sets off the BH. Walking too fast, peeing, bending the wrong way, baby movement….all turn my uterus rock hard. I’m hoping that because of all the practicing, this labor will be even quicker and easier than mine with Lucy was. I’m supposed to call L&D if I have more than 6 BH in an hour…but….that is practically every day. My strategy now is to simply lay down, drink *more* water, eat protein, and see what happens- if that doesn’t stop ‘em, then I’ll call.

- I’m starting to get a little nervous about tandem-nursing. Don’t get me wrong- I didn’t push through all the nipple-soreness, nursing strikes, etc. to give up now. Plus Lucy is nursing as enthusiastically as ever, so I don’t foresee her giving up in the next few weeks. I actually pumped the other day out of curiosity and got an ounce easily, so I know I still have milk. I guess I’m more wondering how it will all work…nursing both before work, both before bed….how much I will be able to pump…is it true that you produce as if you had twins…so many questions! I guess I will just have to wait and see.

- Even though I’ve not gained that much weight, I’m quickly outgrowing all my clothes- including my maternity stuff. I think I’m down to 2 pairs of jeans and a pair of capris that fit. However, I’m not up to buying more stuff, so I think I’ll just suck it up for now…especially since I wear a uniform to work anyways.

Where the Blue Ridge yawns its greatness....

2010-10-22T22:29:00.005-04:00

Last weekend Brett and I decided to haul our happy butts up to Clemson. It had only been a month since we’d visited last, but as my due date approaches, we realized that it was probably our last opportunity to go before no. 2 gets here. Besides, it was a home-game weekend, the weather was supposed to be beautiful, and my mama and aunt said they would be interested in driving down as well- Clemson is about a 12 hour drive for them, an 8 hour drive for us.

Anyway, Brett managed to pack the car while I was at work while simultaneously keeping Lucy distracted from her morning nap. That way, when I got home around lunch, we could hit the road- and Lucy would sleep. All went to plan and the trip went pretty smoothly. I only wish we didn’t have the time-change to deal with- we lose an hour moving from Central to Eastern.

Oh, and before I go any further, I want to give a shout out to our latest purchase- a hitch-mounted cargo carrier and bag. We spent MONTHS debating a new, more generously-sized car (even going so far as to get a loan application and test-drive a beautiful *used* Excursion), but could simply not commit to a car payment (Brett’s truck is paid off, and we’re looking forward to paying off the Honda in a few months). While we both would have loved the Excursion, it wasn’t “fiscally responsible”- aka not fun. Anyway, we spent only $200 for the carrier and bag (which is both HUGE and waterproof, btw), and that’s solved our space issue for now. We’re up front, Lucy’s in the middle (as will be the new baby), and the cargo area is, as usual, occupied by Savannah and Chuck. My, what we sacrifice for our canine babies! Bonus: because the bag is BEHIND the car and not ON TOP of it, it doesn’t hurt gas mileage, and it’s easy to get to.

Back to the story….so Friday night was spent with family. On Saturday, Brett, two of our friends from UGA, my mom, my aunt, and I headed to the Clemson game. Even though we were in the upper UPPER deck, we had a great time. I managed to get what may be the worst sunburn of my life- on my feet! Leave it to me to live in Florida and get burned after a few hours of October sun. As of right now, it still looks as though I have on red socks.

After the game, we returned to Brett's parents' house, where we enjoyed a yummy barbecue. Tons of delicious food, lots of friends, great time! I was especially glad to get to see the Mertens family and finally meet Ms. Abigail in person. Abigail and Lucy are only a few weeks apart in age, and will have siblings very close in age as well- too cute :-)

Sunday was a day for church and relaxation, and I was sad to say goodbye to my mama. The next time I will see her is when the Deuce arrives, so hopefully it won't be too long! We headed back home on Monday, and had a relatively uneventful trip. We managed to make the trip with only one stop, and Lucy behaved very well for the vast majority of it. However, I'm still grateful that I won't have to cram myself in the back seat next to her for quite a while.

Wordless Wednesday.

2010-10-20T22:42:00.003-04:00

Lucy's First Boat Ride.

Nesting.

2010-10-09T16:39:00.005-04:00

With both of my pregnancies, I was very sick for the first 24 weeks or so, experiencing terrible nausea and vomiting and losing 15+ lbs. Thank goodness for the wonder-drug that is Zofran, or I'd probably be a lot worse off. Even after 24 weeks, about the time when I managed to wean myself off Zofran, I still had occasional bouts of the same symptoms, as well as fatigue. I consider myself one of the least productive pregnant women around- I just don't have the energy to do much, even when it involves baby-related things.

Lucy's Clemson tutu, still in progress.

So you can imagine my surprise when I was about 30 weeks pregnant with Lucy and discovered my "nesting" instincts. I woke up one morning and went from feeling really crappy and wanting to lay in bed all day to wanting to clean the grout in the bathroom with a toothbrush (not an exaggeration, by the way). No, not wanting, NEEDING to clean the grout.

Shirt for Lucy- I had to buy an iron-on, because they don't make "big sister" shirts for babies!

The smallest size I could find was 2T...so I whipped up one for her.

Up until that point, I had always thought that nesting was a cutesy term for mamas getting ready for birth, more of an overall desire to get things ready for baby than a mental state. It wasn't until I experienced it myself that I recognized that, for me anyway, nesting should be classified as a legitimate medical condition.

The first knitting project I've stuck with- it's starting to come a little easier, though.

Last week (again, around 30 weeks), the nesting craziness began again. It started Friday night, when I laid in bed, daydreaming about all of the things I could be doing instead of sleeping. Cleaning, baking, and reorganizing the garage all came to mind. When I woke up Saturday morning at about 5:30, I got to work. By the time the weekend was over, in addition to my normal chores, I had managed to cook up 2 gallons of chicken soup, bake 4 dozen pumpkin-chocolate chip cookies, sew a pillowcase dress for Lucy, nearly complete her tutu and a smaller version of it (for who, I didn't stop to consider- it was just cute!), scrapbook several pages for Lucy's book.......During the week, I spent a lot of time knitting, scoping out gender-neutral baby clothing (as if I don't have enough from when Lucy was born), and continuing a long list of chores I'd come up with.

Pumpkin cheesecake- observe the beautiful layers. Delicious- and hey, you gotta feed the nester!

Finally, last night, Brett and I accomplished one of my major nesting goals, one that paves the way for future nesting activities: we re-arranged the nursery to squeeze in an extra crib and dresser. Now that we've figured that out, I can nest to my heart's delight, moving Lucy's clothes to the bigger dresser, sorting through newborn clothes to go in the old one, putting the crib padding and accessories on the new crib (which is pretty ridiculous, since Lucy didn't sleep in a crib until she was over a year old- but I like to use the crib for changing baby's clothes, a place to play while I'm putting clothes away, etc), and decorating. It was hard to sleep last night, thinking of all the possibilities!

Second attempt at a pillowcase dress- peanut butter jelly time!

Of course, it didn't help matters that I bought some half-and-half yesterday at the grocery store that has an expiration date AFTER my due date (yes, it was ultra-pasteurized, but still!)

My mama is crazyyy!

Mommy jealousy and mommy guilt.

2010-10-07T18:59:00.001-04:00

I think all of us experience it at one time or another. Humans are, I believe, rather competitive by nature; we judge our accomplishments according to what our peers have also achieved. As mothers, we often compare the development of our children to those of our friends or family members. Further, we sometimes view our children’s accomplishments as some kind of barometer by which to measure our own success as mothers.

I’ll give you an example. At 13 months, Lucy frequently babbles, hums, and even sings. However, her words are limited to mama, dada, baba, and yeah. Further, even though we’ve worked extensively with her on signing for 6 months now, Lucy only uses a handful of signs, and still somewhat irregularly.

The daughter of a friend is only a little older than the Goose, but is incredibly verbal. Not only does she speak many words, but she speaks them clearly. Additionally, she can sign. Overall she has an incredible grasp of language for a child of her age.

Am I jealous? TOTALLY!

I know I shouldn’t be. I know it’s ridiculous. But I feel the same way when I hear about a child who sleeps through the night, or practically runs through the house, or has hit any number of milestones Lucy hasn’t yet. I know it’s not fair to compare Lucy to other children. I should be satisfied that she is healthy and happy and developing well-within the spectrum of “normal”- who determines what is normal, by the way?

Also, because I work outside of the home, my “mommy guilt” is intense. I’ll bare my soul here: I often wonder if Lucy would be developing differently if I were a stay-at-home mom. Would she be signing more by now? Could she speak more clearly? I feel a great deal of guilt for not being able to spend more time with her during the week.

Please don’t get me wrong- Brett is a fabulous father and does an amazing job with Lucy during the day. He takes her on little trips to the library and the pool, builds pillow forts in the yard, bakes cookies….. I’m immeasurably grateful that not only have we avoided putting Lucy in daycare, but that she gets to spend every day with her Daddy.

I do my best to make the time I get to spend with Lucy quality time, mainly through attachment parenting techniques like extended breastfeeding, babywearing, and, until recently, bedsharing. Still, the daily separation from my daughter is difficult. The guilt that I feel from having to work every day (and yes, for the record, I HAVE to work- my military service commitment wasn’t up yet when Lucy was born) makes it hard for me to justify spending time away from her at all when I’m not working. For heaven’s sake, I felt terrible for *one time* leaving her at home with Brett instead of taking her grocery shopping with me on a Saturday morning. I have a gift certificate for a massage sitting on my office desk that’s been there since Mother’s Day- how could I possibly justify spending one of the two mornings I have off during the week at the spa?

I can’t help but look forward to the day when I’ll get the chance to stay home with Lucy and her little brother or sister. I can’t wait until I can guiltlessly take some time for myself because I “earned” it, having taken care of the kids all week. I’m anxious for when I can take them to the library, go on play dates, etc- at which point Lucy will probably be old enough to say, “Why can’t Daddy stay home with me?”

Sigh.

Wordless Wednesday.

2010-10-06T21:04:00.003-04:00

This WW is brought to you by my first attempt at a pillowcase-style dress for Miss Lucy.

30 weeks.

2010-10-02T20:22:00.003-04:00

I'm 30 weeks today, and it's October now, which means.....that if I have this baby at 38 weeks like I did Lucy, I could have a baby NEXT MONTH! Wahoooooo!

Just gotta brag a little.

2010-09-28T21:24:00.002-04:00

I am so proud of my Lucy!

When we first decided to nightwean, I struggled. I worried about how Lucy would handle the change. She surprised both Brett and I when she made the adjustment relatively smoothly, with very little fussing at all. The whole process took less than a week, and we maintained our family bed. For more details on the technique we used, check out Dr. Jay Gordon's website.

However, we all knew this was a short-term solution- while I love, love, love bed-sharing, it simply isn't safe with a toddler and a newborn in the same bed. So Brett and I finally took the plunge and began to make the adjustment to having Lucy sleep in her own crib. Right now, the crib's still in our room, but eventually we will move her to the nursery- we don't want to have issues with the new baby waking her up and vice-versa.

Anyway, tonight marks Lucy's fourth night in her crib. The first two nights, it took 45 and 30 minutes to put her to sleep, respectively. Because I don't believe in allowing babies to "cry-it-out," I spent that time sitting on a pillow beside Lucy's crib. Following her nighttime nursing session and follow-up bottle, I would lay her down in her crib with her "lovey" and "paci," and rub her back while singing to her. If she stood up and tried to play, I would simply lay her down again and continue on. Although it took more patience than I previously knew I had, my persistence overcame Lucy's will to stay awake, and she eventually fell asleep with virtually no tears shed and minimum fussing.

On the third night, Lucy put herself to sleep! After laying her down with her paci and lovey as before, she just went right to sleep. The same thing occurred tonight. I am in awe!

Although we still have a ways to go (Lucy still wakes up several times at night, often needing one of us to replace her paci before she can fall back asleep, and she does come in to our bed in the morning, because I nurse her before work), I am so proud of my daughter! She is proving to be a very flexible and resilient little girl.

Just a little note.

2010-09-25T18:15:00.002-04:00

I love nursing one of my children to sleep, while the other is happily kicking away!

Lucy at 1 year.

2010-09-24T20:36:00.003-04:00

I’ve been meaning to post this for a while, but I wanted to wait until Lucy’s 1-year checkup so that I could post her weight and height. However, I’m increasingly concerned that I’m going to forget to do it at all, so I’m going to go ahead and blog now, insert data later (her appointment is on Tuesday, btw.)

At one year of age, Lucy eats…..

Everything we do! She particularly likes chicken, avocado, and all kinds of fruit. Despite my attempts to keep sweets to a minimum, Lucy is a sucker for Daddy’s homemade chocolate chip cookies and will mooch whatever I’m eating- especially ice cream! It’s great to be able to feed her whatever we’re eating and not worry about preparing anything especially for her. Next up: working on eating with a spoon and fork.

Lucy drinks…..

Organic whole milk, water, breast milk. It’s funny because I always thought that once she was off formula we’d be saving money, but….organic milk is expensive, and we go through a ton of it. Add in her supplement (to make up for the nutrients milk is lacking), and we’re definitely spending more. At least we are minimizing the yucky additives- Similac recall, anyone? Still, I prefer beetles to corn syrup any day! She still takes her milk from a bottle, but she drinks water from a sippy or a regular cup and breast milk straight from the tap. I’m not a fan of juice at all, and prefer Lucy eats fresh fruit instead- fruit has a better concentration of vitamins, no extra refined sugar, and no empty calories. Lucy still nurses twice a day- once in the morning, and once at night. She occasionally will skip a night session (this usually happens if she ends up being satisfied with what’s in her bottle and decides to just go to sleep), but she always makes up for it in the morning. Next up: working on getting more proficient with her cup, and ditching the bottle.

Lucy sleeps….

In our bed for the most part. We just bought a crib, and we’re working on putting her in it for a few hours at a time at night and for naps during the day. She generally sleeps from 6:30-7pm to 6-7am. Nighttime wake-ups are very infrequent now that she’s night-weaned, and she is getting much more consistent with sleeping through the night- although I will confess to giving her the boob if she’s having a rough time. My usual technique is to lay on our bed with her, cuddle while she has her bottle, nurse her when she’s done, and then move her to the crib. However, she always ends up in our bed by the end of the night. Next up: working on getting her to sleep through the night in her crib.

Lucy loves…..

Humming and singing to herself while she dances to her own songs, her “Baby Sign” dvd (the only tv I let her watch besides Classical Baby- she gets super excited when I put it on and mimics the signs), playing with the dogs (I’ve had to pull her out of their kennels on numerous occasions), making music with her “shake-shakes,” picking out her own clothes and “helping” get dressed, pushing her baby doll around in her stroller, JEWELRY and other "pitty" things (both mine and her own), going through her extensive library of books at least once a day, pointing at everything to hear its name, turning light switches off and on, dancing to music, playing outside, throwing/stacking/organizing building blocks, being worn by Mama (but not Daddy), being around other people- she’s a total show-off.

Lucy dislikes…..

Having her diaper changed- it’s definitely been a challenge for us lately, riding in her car seat (unless I’m sitting back there with her), being fed ANYTHING with a spoon, being helped with tasks- she has an independent streak a mile wide and will not let us do anything for her.

Lucy can….

Take 4-5 steps independently (usually between Mama and Daddy), stand on her own, cruise around the entire house with one hand on the wall, “scoot” on her booty- leaving one hand free to carry items, sign (dog, milk, all-done, Daddy) even if she isn’t consistent with it yet, take off her diaper, throw items across the room, figure out how to open any and all containers, trash the entire house in about five minutes.

Lucy weighs 20 lbs, 2oz and is 30 inches long.

28 weeks.

2010-09-20T22:22:00.002-04:00

Why hello, third trimester! It's great to see you. I'm equally parts ready to be done with pregnancy and terrified of having two children until 14 months.....

Pics are from a dear friend's wedding. I know my hair looks crazy in the photo, but rest assured that it looked fabulous in person :-)

We have names!

2010-09-13T21:15:00.002-04:00

I'm not going to post these on Facebook, because I'm not ready for the potentially-negative comments...I know not everyone shares my love of old-fashioned names. But I'm so excited to finally settle on a girl's name that I have to share! We've been decided on a boy's name for quite some time- Max is for Maxcy, which is Brett's given name, and Robert is for my dad. We both liked the first name June, but we couldn't think of a middle name that we really liked...until last night. Because we don't find out the gender ahead of time, it's really important to me to have both determined ahead of time. It somehow makes me feel more prepared!

So....

If it's a boy.....he'll be Max Robert

If it's a girl...she'll be June Elizabeth

27 weeks.

2010-09-12T12:12:00.001-04:00

I'm done with pumping...

2010-09-10T20:35:00.003-04:00

...for now, anyway.

I have long looked forward to Lucy's first birthday for a number of reasons, one selfish one being that I could (according to most sources) safely cut-out pumping during the daytime.

For almost a year (I started pumping when Lucy was about a month old), I have pumped nearly every day. If it was a work day, then I definitely pumped- at least twice (for the first seven or eight months), then at least once. If I wasn't working, I still generally fit one session in, sometimes because Lucy was having a little nursing strike and I wanted to keep up my supply, sometimes because I wanted to put a little extra in the freezer (this was especially true when I was donating). So you'd think I'd be super excited about dropping my daily lunchtime pumping session.

Still, it feels a little strange. I think I miss having those few minutes carved out of my day to focus on Lucy.

Anyway, I still have a pump at work in case Lucy decides to skip her morning nursing session, and I have a pump at home for the same reason at night. Luckily, though, Lucy is pretty attached to nursing both morning and night, and I'm still producing enough to keep her happy at those times.

Nursing through a pregnancy isn't easy, but I think it's worth it- especially if you have a young child already (Lucy was only 6 months old when I became pregnant this time). Even if we weaned today, we'd have achieved 6 more months of nursing than we would have had we weaned immediately. Of course, everyone is different- some mamas lose their supply completely, and some drop in supply more quickly than others. And there's definitely nothing wrong with weaning due to pregnancy, as some mamas either don't desire to tandem nurse or are uncomfortable with nursing during pregnancy- either physically or emotionally. I would never judge nor criticize another mama for her decision in that regard.

No, breastfeeding while pregnant isn't very comfortable...but I'm counting the days until I have a fresh supply, and will hopefully be able to nurse both Lucy and her little brother or sister. On a side note, both Brett and I came down with a terrible stomach bug this week, and even though I ended up having to visit the ER for fluids, I managed to keep nursing...and guess what? Lucy didn't get sick even though she sleeps snuggled up to me every night. Another reason to push through!

Gettin' down on the farm.

2010-09-07T21:30:00.007-04:00

I'm not gonna lie- our recent trip to PA was planned not only around Lucy's birthday, but around the county fair. As a country kid, I eagerly looked forward to the fair every year- when you grow up on a dairy farm, you don't usually get to go on family vacations, so the fair was our time to have fun. I was really excited to not only make it home in time for the fair, but to take Lucy for her first trip, too. We had a great time catching up with old friends, spending time with family, and of course indulging in some (nutrient-deficient and calorie-packed, but undeniably delicious) fair food!

She loves the Eeyore Mimi bought her for her birthday.

She made quick friends with Jordanna's Jersey calf.

Our new Ergo got LOTS of use- everyone wanted to carry the Goose.

Lots of animals!

Fair food- Lucy dominating an apple fritter.

Happy birthday, baby!

2010-09-02T22:39:00.006-04:00

Happy birthday to my Lucy-Goose!

I know you're not technically a baby anymore, but you'll always be MY baby.